Thursday, June 25, 2009

U.S.S. New York

Here she is !! As you scroll down, notice the two twin towers on top.

The USS New York, made from the World Trade Center !

It was built with 24 tons of scrap steel from the World Trade Center . It is the fifth in a new class of warship - designed for missions that include special operations against terrorists. It will carry a crew of 360 sailors and 700 combat-ready Marines to be delivered ashore by helicopters and assault craft.. Steel from the World Trade Center was melted down in a foundry in Amite , LA to cast the ship's bow section. When it was poured into the molds on Sept 9, 2003 , 'those big rough steelworkers treated it with total reverence,' recalled Navy Capt. Kevin Wensing, who was there. 'It was a spiritual moment for everybody there.' Junior Chavers, foundry operations manager, said that when the trade center steel first arrived, he touched it with his hand and the 'hair on my neck stood up.' 'It had a big meaning to it for all of us,' he said.. 'They knocked us down. They can't keep us down. We're going to be back.' The ship's motto?

'Never Forget'

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Joke of the Day!

This made me laugh...


He writes:

I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver, who cut right in front of a pickup truck, causing the driver to drive onto the shoulder to avoid hitting her.

This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and gave the woman the finger.

'Man, that guy is stupid,' I thought to myself. I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic, and here's why:

I drive 48 miles each way every day to work.

That's 96 miles each day.

Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to bumper.

Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway.

There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles.

That works out to 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars.

Even though the rest of the 32 miles is notbumper-to-bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars.

That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass every day.


females drive half of these.

That's 18,000 women drivers!

In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS.

That's 642.

According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding.

That's 449.

According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide.
That's 98.

And 34% describe men as their biggest problem.

That's 33.

According to the National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry weapons and this number is increasing.

That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is armed.

Give her the finger?

I don't think so.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Sammy Sosa Joins Exclusive Club of Baseball’s Greatest Sluggers

From humble beginnings in the slums of the Dominican Republic to a household name in the United States: it’s the story of Sammy Sosa. And now the former Cubs star has further solidified his place in baseball history.

“To be mentioned in the same sentence as guys like Barry Bonds, Alex Rodriguez, Mark McGwire, Rafael Palmeiro and Manny Ramirez – it’s a dream come true,” said Sammy Sosa, upon hearing his name was among the players who testified positive for steroids in 2003. “No one thought I could do this. When I came up to the majors, I was viewed as just a fast outfielder with a little bit of pop. Now, 609 home runs and about that many steroids cycles later, I’m immortal. Who could believe it?”

Sosa says he will never forget where he was when he got the call about the positive test. “I heard it from a member of the media first,” he said. “And after he told me I sh!t my pants. Literally. I was terrified and also years of steroids use left me with a weak sphincter of all things. And then I babbled some Spanglish until he got off the phone.

But with some time to reflect on the news, Sosa was able to put it into perspective.

“There were whispers and rumors about this for years,” said Sosa. “But I don’t think you really believe it until you hear it officially. I’m glad to remove that doubt about my career. I feel at peace.”

Sosa says the next call he will be waiting for will be from Cooperstown. “In a few years I’ll get the call that I wasn’t elected to the Hall of Fame,” he said. “At least that’s the call I hope I get next. I’m kind of worried the next call could be from the feds to prosecute me for lying in front of Congress.”

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Wednesday, June 17, 2009


1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.

6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.

7 Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.

8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your breakfast.

11.. You start tilting your head sideways to smile.. : )

12 You're reading this and nodding and laughing.

13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to share this message with.

14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list AND NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING at yourself.

Go on, tell your friends. You know you want to.

Friday, June 12, 2009

If only this was true...

The light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.

The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration, as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup. As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer.

The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she was searched, fingerprinted, photographed, and placed in a holding cell. After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.

He said, ''I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'What Would Jesus Do' bumper sticker, the 'Choose Life' license plate holder, the 'Follow Me to Sunday-School' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk, so naturally....I assumed you had stolen the car.''

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Things we can do with out in Sports...

The Pro Bowl.The last Pro Bowl needed 11 injury replacement players, so it isn't exactly the cream of the crop of all-star rosters. Plus, it's the least interesting and least intense of the all-star games.
Roger Clemens and his ever-expanding array of reasons why he couldn't have possibly taken PEDs.

The designated hitter.


Michael Phelps

DUIs and pro athletes.According to ESPN The Magazine, 1,875 of the 4,420 athletes who play in the NFL, NBA, MLB or NHL earn at least $1 million. The minimum salary for the lowest-paid rookie in any of those four leagues is $295,000. So, please, you can afford a $31 cab ride back home from the nightclub.

Jose Canseco and the MMA.

Players with tattoos in Chinese.Just asking, but do you think Chinese players get tattoos in English?

Any more references to or lingering TV camera shots of Jack Nicholson at a Los Angeles Lakers game.

TV dugout shot of a big league player just as he's doing a nose excavation. Or spitting. Or scratching.

NFL players who, in the taped TV introductions, say their name and then, "THE Ohio State University."If you're going to be that smug, then you at least have to have an actual diploma from THE university.

NBA arena deejays. Its sad to see Cedric Ceballos in this role.

Terrell Owens.

Chad Ochocinco

Anquon Boldin
Amar'e Stoudemire
A new Wrigley Field or Fenway Park.

LeBron and Kobe. The match up that didn't happen.

NBA refs who think we tuned in to watch them officiate.

NBA league officials who rescind technical fouls.And they just happen to be T's called against Kobe and Dwight Howard. Interesting.

Cell phone addicts behind home plate.Yes, we see you waving frantically at the center field TV camera. And, yes, we think you look like an idiot.

A new, $412-million, dome-less Minnesota Twins baseball stadium. It was 29 degrees on Opening Day 2009; half of the 14 days on which the Twins played home games in April had lows in the 30s.

A Barry Bonds sighting. He's done.

Male cheerleaders. Its too painful to see.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Roger Federer

Tennis has always been one of my favorite sports. My Favorite player of all time is Andre Agassi. He was always a great sport, modest, and his game was fun to watch. I had the experience of seeing him play in one of the best venues for tennis: The U.S. Open. It was an amazing experience and I was with my dad. He actually snuck me into the stadium to see him play.

This weekend was the finals of the French Open. Tennis has many tournaments every year but the biggest are the Grand Slams: Australian Open played in January; French Open played in May-June; Wimbledon played late June and July; U.S. Open played in August-September. The French open is unique in that it is played on clay.

Roger Federer won this years tournament. This was the first time he had won this tournament. This victory gave him a career Grand Slam. He has now won all four Grand Slam tournaments. This was the only one eluding him. The last player to complete this feat was Agassi.

Most tennis people will argue that Pete Sampras is the greatest player of all time. This is based off of the fact that he won a total of 14 career grand slams, more than anyone else. Agassi won a career total of 8.

By winning this year's French Open, Roger Federer has won 14 career Grand Slams. That ties him with Sampras with the most ever. He will be 28 in August. More than likely, he will win his 15th at Wimbledon this year. He will then continue to play and win more. He might have a chance to win 20.

I got to see a little bit of the match this weekend. Federer's game is amazing to see. He has so much power and finesse at the same time. Sampras was fun to watch, but difficult at times. He was all power: serve and volley. Federer seems to stay back most of the time and his opponent (at least this one) had problems getting to the net. It was fun to see these two guys play. Truely, a fun match to see!

I hope that Federer continues to win. He is a great ambassador not only for tennis, but sports in general. Here's to you Roger !!!

45 Tips for Life...

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it

.9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past, so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood... But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive every one everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

Friday, June 5, 2009

Bonehead of the Week Award

Couple Arrested For Asking For Directions...

Baltimore City police arrested a Virginia couple over the weekend after they asked an officer for directions.
WBAL-TV 11 News I-Team reporter David Collins said Joshua Kelly and Llara Brook, of Chantilly, Va., got lost leaving an Orioles game on Saturday. Collins reported a city officer arrested them for trespassing on a public street while they were asking for directions .
"In jail for eight hours -- sleeping on a concrete floor next to a toilet," Kelly said.
"It was a nightmare," Brook said. "I was in there thinking I was just dreaming and waiting to wake up."
Collins reported it was a nightmare ending to a nearly perfect day. He said the couple went to a company picnic and watched the Orioles beat Kansas City. It was their first trip to Camden Yards and asked two people for directions to Interstate 95 South when they left.
Collins said somehow they ended up in the Cherry Hill section of south Baltimore. Hopelessly lost, relief melted away concerns after they spotted a police vehicle.
"I said, 'Thank goodness, could you please get us to 95?" Kelly said.
"The first thing that she said to us was no -- you just ran that stop sign, pull over," Brook said. "It wasn't a big deal. We'll pay the stop sign violation, but can we have directions?"
"What she said was 'You found your own way in here, you can find your own way out.'" Kelly said.
Collins said the couple spotted another police vehicle and flagged that officer down for directions. But Officer Natalie Preston, a six-year veteran of the force, intervened.
"That really threw us for a loop when she stepped in between our cars," Kelly said. "(She) said my partner is not going to step in front of me and tell you directions if I'm not."
Collins reported the circumstances got worse. Kelly pulled 40 feet forward parking next to a curb and put his flashers on while Brook was on the phone to her father hoping he could help her with directions. Both her parents are police officers in the Harrisburg, Pa., area.
"(Brook's father) was in the middle of giving us directions when the officer screeched up behind us and got out of the car and asked me to step out. I obeyed," Kelly said. "I obeyed everything -- stepped out of the car, put my hands behind my back, and the next thing I know, I was getting arrested for trespassing."
"By this time, I was completely in tears," Brook said. "I said, 'Ma'am, you know, we just need your help. We are not trying to cause you any trouble. I'm not leaving him here.' What she did was walk over to my side of the car and said, 'Ok, we are taking you downtown, too.'"
Collins said the couple was released from jail without being charged with anything. Brook is now concerned the arrest may complicate a criminal background check she's going through in her job as a child care worker.
Collins said police left Kelly's car unlocked and the windows down at the impound lot. He reported a cell phone charger, pair of sunglasses and 20 CDs were stolen.
Baltimore City police said they are looking into the incident.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009


In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University . On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.. He got down on one knee, inspected the elephants foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teen aged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man. Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing, and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing killing him instantly.

Probably wasn't the same elephant.